Written by: Milan Duda
Art: Nenad Vitas
What did you want to be when you were a kid?
I wish I could remember it, but for sure it wasn’t a hotel owner or a real estate developer.
In which country would you like to live?
Wherever people are friendly, women are charming, food is good, and you can count on an airport that is close by when you want to fly away.
Do you think it is better to say everything or not to know everything?
Nobody says everything and I would be frightened to know everything.
What is never missing from your fridge?
Food for my dog.
How do you get up in the morning?
Turning on the TV and watching the news. It may happen at 6am and that has always been a good reason for my former girlfriends to leave me.
What is the best place to make love?
On the deck of my boat, on a warm summer night, hoping that mosquitoes don’t become too curious.
What is the worst place to make love?
In a small Italian car, hidden in a public garden, afraid that the guards might become too curious.
Do you need to love to make love or do you need to make love in order to love?
Love is always passion, at least at the beginning. So, no sex, no love. It may change, maybe into a deeper feeling. But that’s not love anymore.
What do you like the most about women and what do you despise?
I admire that they are so pragmatic and I hate them for the same reason.
What do you like the most about men and what do you despise?
The few I like are eternal dreamers, the many I don’t are big pretenders.
Who is your favorite fictional character?
The one invented by my father, who was a writer: a cowboy called Tex Willer. His success made my life much easier.
What’s your favorite insult?
I don’t like to insult even my worst enemies. But if I was brave enough, I would kill them all.
What’s your favorite saying?
The world is full of idiots.
Which meal can you prepare yourself?
What about a creamy Milanese saffron risotto?
If you were organizing a dinner to which you could invite five people from any place and any era, whom would you invite?
Five old friends of mine from the past with whom I could recall old memories.
If you had to sacrifice one of your senses (sight, hearing, taste, etc.) which one would it be?
Hearing. At least it would help me not to have to listen to a lot of nonsense. But I would miss Mozart and U2.
If you won in a lottery and no longer had to work to earn a living, what occupation or vocation would you pursue?
It would not change anything at all. I work for fun.
Would you like a role in an action movie?
Life itself is a movie and we are all actors. The only problem is that there are no other performances after the premiere.
What would be the first thing you would warn an extraterrestrial creature?
Watch out for our beautiful women. For sure you will fall in love, but they can be more dangerous than an asteroid.
Do you like happy endings?
Of course I do, but the task is difficult…ask our extraterrestrial friend in few years.